Real Engineers...

Real Engineers consider themselves well dressed if their socks match

Real Engineers buy their spouses a set of matched screw- drivers for their

Real Engineers wear mustaches or beards for "efficiency". Not because they're

Real engineers have a non-technical vocabulary of 800 words.

Real Engineers think a "biting wit" is their fox terrier.

Real Engineers know the second law of thermodynamics - but not their own shirt

Real Engineers repair their own cameras, telephones, televisions, watches,
and automatic transmissions.

Real Engineers say "It's 70 degrees Fahrenheit, 25 degrees Celsius, and 298
degrees Kelvin" and all you say is "Isn't it a nice day"

Real Engineers give you the feeling you're having a conversation with a dial
tone or busy signal.

Real Engineers wear badges so they don't forget who they are. Sometimes a note
is attached saying "Don't offer me a ride today. I drove my own car".

Real Engineers' politics run towards acquiring a parking  space with their
name on it and an office with a window.

Real Engineers know the "ABC's of Infrared" from A to B.

Real Engineers rotate their tires for laughs.

Real Engineers will make four sets of drawings (with seven revisions) before
making a bird bath.

Real Engineers' briefcases contain a Philips screwdriver, a copy of "Quantum
Physics", and a half of a peanut butter sandwich.

Real Engineers don't find the above at all funny.

- Anonymous